Honestly, I have been in this limbo for quite a time now... have been exploring things that somewhat excites something in me, though I know for a fact that it doesn't conform to the standards of being prim and proper — morally upright and correct. Yes, I am very much aware of it and what it is but sometimes it's just so hard not to give in...temptation really do finds its ways to cripple your sense of sanity.
Maybe you're not that emotionally secured like what you think or maybe there's no such thing as security? I have been showered with enough to make me scream 'I am feeling secured!' yet I still tend to do stupid things that if all hell breaks loose it will definitely ruin those reasons that makes me feel secure at all...
I'd say all of us tend to be 'schizo' because it takes a lot to be in control of the different personalities inside us...one moment, we're smooth sailing and then the next, we're already sinking...
With all of these doubts and hanging questions, I'd rather conclude that there's no standard — not even a single one that can define security. Security is about finding that specific reason which will make you feel complete AND really holding so damn hard into it...
Temptations will always be there but it does not mean inevitable...It takes acceptance, contentment and firm mindset to really attain sense of security to withstand and shoo away any temptations along the road — which I admittedly need to learn.
